Quick Recipes and Easy

Starbucks Cancels the Cinnamon Streusel – A National Tragedy

War, terrorist threats, nuclear threats, famine, genocide, natural disasters, political and social injustice, murder, rape, Anna Nicole Smith – and that’s just one newscast on cable TV. My senses are numbed to the point that I yawn when some new horror is splashed on the screen. But today mankind suffered an outrage that must be addressed.

Starbucks has dropped the cinnamon streusel from its pastries. For years I’ve been a voice crying in the wilderness, begging Starbucks to buy more cinnamon streusels. How many times have I suffered near death experiences when some streusel crazed Starbucks freak cut me off swerving into the parking lot in the hope of grabbing the last streusel? How many times have I stood in line for my latté, eyeing the last streusel, only to have my hopes dashed as it’s snatched away by the person in front of me.

Nothing else sells in their pastry case until all the cinnamon streusels are gone. It is by far their most well loved pastry. I mean how can anyone resist that crispy fringe of brown sugar, butter, cinnamon, and pecans that leaked out from the multiple layers of dough and caramelized into a divine curst.

Of course there are those times when some bone idle lout of a baker failed to carefully coat the rolled out dough with the brown sugar, cinnamon, butter and pecans, fold it over, roll it out again, and repeat this process until perfection is achieved. Instead, he produces a triangular biscuit with some indistinguishable stuff on top. A terrible streusel day trumps a terrible hair day anytime

My letters to Starbucks Central in Seattle explaining the logic of buying more of what’s selling (cinnamon streusel) and less of what’s not (everything else) fell on deaf ears. And now in an exercise of self-flagellation, they discontinued cinnamon streusel entirely. All of the sunshine has flooded from the windows of my soul, and my heart is a dry husk.

I call on all streuselers everywhere to unite to right this grievous incorrect. Deluge Info@starbucks.com with your demand that cinnamon streusel be reinstated so the world can again spin in greased grooves.

Bill Stephens offeres his novel for free on horizonspast.com horizonspast.com where you can read, comment and critique. His essays appear in his blog “Read It and Weep” posted on Publishersmarketplace.com/members/billstephens Publishersmarketplace.com/members/billstephens

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